Pee with a capital KID

While I love flipping through shelter magazines as much as the next (gay) guy, many of the gorgeous images displayed on the glossy pages leave me wondering if people actually live in those spaces.  I've always admired the simplicity of modern design, but it feels incredibly uncomfortable and cold to me.  In the same vein, rooms filled with antique rugs, fabric walls, chandeliers and dramatic European furnishings often beg the question...what if a kid spills ice cream on that sofa, or a dog piddles on the rug?  Just like the starving stick models splashed on covers draped in foolish clothing most wouldn't be caught dead wearing to the dump, some interior design magazines take "stylized interiors" a bit too far.  After all, kids spill.  Shoes often track mud on clean rugs.  And, yes, dogs pee..wherever they want.  A few years ago I mentioned a great find when I spotted sunbrella fabric-covered throw pillows at Pottery Barn on sale at the end of summer.  I grabbed a bunch and used them indoors in a pet-filled home of a client.  That client recently came back for more interior therapy after pets (and young children) destroyed one of her favorite sofas with slobber, urine and other bodily discharges.  I directed her to the sunbrella fabric site (www.sunbrella.com) and others like JoAnn Fabrics, Michaels, Calico Corners and even places like walmart and Ikea.  The colors and patterns of outdoor fabric have evolved from backyard drab to indoor fab!  So next time your kid decides to drop goo or your pet goes number two, don't fear, your fabric will wipe clear!

ALL OR NOTHING OR EVERYTHING FOR NOTHING?

I know it might sound crazy to think that you can decorate an entire home for less than $500, but what if I told you I accomplished that task in the home above for less than $400??  Sure it takes a little creativity, but it can be done!  Allow me just one sidebar today...I remember when I was working in Hollywood and a (somewhat) snooty stylist told me she'd never buy jeans for less than $500 let alone sit on an Ikea sofa.  Humm.  I saw on Facebook she's living in a tiny apartment in a not-so-lovely part of Hollywood.  Guess those expensive jeans took priority after a lovely place to hang them!  I, on the other hand, never turn my nose up to a good deal.  While I found some fantastic steals at Ikea (the sofa I found in the as-is section for $75 and the king platform bed was $55 also in the as-is section, were both used as displays) I used other tips I've given in this space to keep costs down.  The magazine holder/mail organizer on the desk in the far corner of the living room is actually a window shutter from an old house I found thrown in a field.  The "art" hanging over the sofa is a Paul Hecht original (note sarcasm) where I took a $5 canvas from Michaels Arts and Crap store, painted it in various colors and let it sit out in the rain for a few minutes before drying.  The lucite nightstands in the bedroom are TV trays I found at an estate sale for $15.  While some people like to slip into an expensive pair of jeans, I get great satisfaction walking into a comfortable home decorated for far less than one pair!

Get an A+ if you D-Clutter!

No matter what you are doing or where you are going on the road of life, you have to start somewhere, right?  The same simple statement can be applied to any home project, especially moving.  One of the major hurdles I have to overcome with clients when preparing their homes for the market is to remind them who the buyer is...NOT THEM!  If I had a dollar for every homeowner who was initially offended when I suggested removing family photos, religious memorabilia or moving furniture, well, I'd be an incredibly wealthy man!  Emotional attachments to homes are almost as big as the structures themselves, but picture yourself in the shoes of a potential buyer and then, well, HIDE YOUR SHOES!  The cheat sheet for staging 101 is to remove any religious and/or political items from your home first...Ms. Manners suggests never to discuss religion or politics at a party, and Mr. Design says the same thing about your interior decor.  Edit.  Edit.  Then edit again.  Take the charming upstate New York bungalow above, if you will.  Upon walking into the living room I saw potential everywhere...moldings, archways, french windows and doors, beautiful wood floors and comfortable spaces.  The only problem, I also saw 25 years of collectibles getting in the way.  While the collection of fans above the archway tell an incredible story about where this family has been (some were found in China, the Bahamas, South America and France) they don't allow the house to tell its story.  When I worked for a Television production company in Hollywood, a Producer once said you only have thirty seconds to grab the audiences attention as their flipping through the channels, and the same can be said for potential home buyers.  The edits above took me an hour, do you think they were worth it?
QUICK TIP: To get a better idea of what potential buyers might be looking for in your home, pop onto any real estate site (I love www.realtor.com) and study the descriptions written by realtors about a particular home.  What are they focusing on?  Do you ever read, "fabulous painting in the living room and lovely dishes in the kitchen?" NO!  Realtors focus on key elements like moldings, arches, wood floors, etc. and you should too, if you want to sell!  If a realtor says the three keys in real estate are location, location, location, your focus on staging should be edit, edit, edit!
**A year later I had to revisit this staging project from last year.  After I spent a week in this house it went on the market and sold in less than a month.  I'm not saying it was only my tweaks, but they sure helped and it's easier than you think to clean up your act!**

BALANCING BUDGETS

Two of the most challenging things I deal with on a daily basis are managing clients budgets and their expectations, and quite often they never match.  One might think a client with a million dollar design budget would be a pain in the neck to work with (and they often are) but, believe it or not, it's the one with little to no budget that expects to squeeze every penny and creative thought out of me.  Which, by the way, I would expect and don't mind at all.  So, today I thought it would be fun to play a little budget game and show you some of my favorite things from this week of shopping at every budget level.  Prepare to loosen those purse strings and have some fun shopping!
UNDER $5: I mentioned solar lights last week and I think it is a complete waste to spend more than a dollar on them when these in the top photo are available at the Dollar Tree in multiple colors.  I've had the same grouping for three years now and ALL of them still work!
UNDER $50: Ikea is constantly developing modern, unique pieces at incredibly reasonable prices and this metal coffee table on wheels would be the perfect accent piece in any New York city apartment (or anywhere, for that matter).  At $49 it's hard to beat and comes in this cool blue, red, white and stainless steel.
UNDER $500: Years ago I found this cool counter top dishwasher (last photo) for a tight Manhattan apartment.  They were fairly new to the market and quite expensive, and now they're available everywhere from walmart to Best Buy.  At $375 I love this model by Danby that hooks up to any kitchen sink with ease and promises to wash up to six place settings at a time.  If you're pressed for space or need an extra dishwasher near your outdoor cooking area, this is pretty cool!
UNDER $15,000:  Sure this is a stretch for most budgets, but the kitchen photo in the middle is actually an 80 square foot cabin on wheels thanks to www.tumbleweedhouses.com who design mobile self-contained cabins from 50 to 130 square feet.  Who needs to build a new one when you can buy one of these, pull it to your favorite destination and just leave it?

FROM CAMPING TO GLAMPING

I'm sure some of you will be shocked when I admit that I, a highfalutin successful bi-coastal Interior Designer and former host of design shows on TV,  admits that I love camping (said in jest, of course)!  Well, yes, I do!! I think I've loved camping from the day I laid eyes on Barbie and her 3' long yellow vintage motorhome in the aisles of Grand Central in Santa Fe, New Mexico in 1979 (actually the motorhome wasn't vintage then, only now!).  Something about a self-contained home on wheels that could go wherever adventure led you, just fascinated me.  Sadly, that sense of adventure on wheels with a sink, bathroom and sofa didn't fascinate anyone in my family, so I had to wait until adulthood to explore the great outdoors in an rv.  Today I received tempaper (temporary wallpaper you can remove when you want..great for staging projects and something I've blogged about a thousand times) so will be "glamping" up my vintage trailer this weekend (glamping, for those of you knew to the camping world, is glamorous camping!).  Well, let me rephrase that, actually.  As the first storm of the season blows its way towards the northeast this weekend, I'm hoping I get to glamp up my camper and the weather stays at bay.  We'll see.  Speaking of bad weather and preparing for it, allow me to wrap my camping story above into a design piece.  Whilst stumbling around various sites for cool, vintage camping gear I came across an old coffee press.  I love my morning coffee no matter where I am, so if I'm camping off the grid without electricity, I thought this would be a great way to get a good cup of Joe.  Well, it tasted like dirt, spit up chewing tobacco and mildew.  So, I let function trump form and purchased this Coleman propane ten cup coffee maker with stainless steel carafe.  Because we lose power in our neck of the woods during just about every storm, every season, we are prepared with propane lanterns (purchased at places like the Home Depot, walmart, Target, etc.).  They're powered by propane canisters and those same canisters (about $12 for 6 that last for awhile) power this great little coffee maker.  While I love getting away from it, I don't like when my coffee tastes like sh*t, so this was a great find and makes coffee that I just don't mind!
BE CAMPY!
I've mentioned many times how often we lose power in the northeast from hurricanes, snow storms, powerful rainstorms or just mother nature dropping a tree limb on power lines.  If you're in California most likely you've lost power during an earthquake.  The midwest, tornadoes.  Basically, no matter where you live you should prepare for the unexpected.  Looking to friends who camp could give you great ideas...propane powers just about everything to small grills, portable toilets, lanterns and coffee makers.  While it sucks to be out of power, being prepared makes you feel powerful!

MUNDANE MONDAY

If you are anything like me, sometimes Mondays feel like a trip to the doctor..you know you can't avoid them, but they just aren't all that fun.  Like everything else in life, though, time rolls on ahead and before you know it TUESDAY will be here!  I wasn't feeling terribly inspired today when I approached bare walls in a clients house that were desperate for attention.  Then, after a shot of caffeine, I remembered one of my favorite things to do on walls...little to nothing at all.  Sometimes the biggest, most dramatic impact can be one that's quite simple.  I went through a phase a few years ago where I'd stroll the aisles of antique stores and pick up fun, empty frames.  I had high hopes for those frames, assuming someday they'd wrap around fantastic photos of beautiful homes we'd live in, or help frame a perfect smile for eternity.  Instead I decided to sell them to one of the first clients I had in New York on the Upper East side of Manhattan.  When she first saw them (she was about as soft and lovely as a jack hammer) through her strong New Yawk accent she belted out, "what dumpstuh did you pull those wretched things out of?"  So, as I do with many clients, I ignored her, raced to a nearby over-priced hardware store and purchased three different shades of fabulous yellow paint in high gloss.  The following day this loud mouth was speechless when she walked in her entry and was greeted by a wall of frameless art.  That pain in the ass has become one of my biggest supporters and best city friends, and that project is one I like to repeat over and over. One frame on one wall is kinda like Mondays...boring, tedious and totally annoying, but frames of different sizes and shapes (all in the same color family) can look incredible just by themselves.  Bold statements, my friends, don't always have to be colorful ones!

LETS GET PHYSICAL (or just organized)

The weekend is finally here (I know it's been a short week, but hey...) while some people love to ride bikes, kayak, run along the beach or do other outdoor activities on the weekend, I like to get our house organized!  One place that seems to get piled high with junk right before your eyes is the garage.  I just popped my head into ours and it looks like a UPS shipping center with more empty boxes from client shipping's, Christmas gifts (yes, I haven't gotten around to throwing them away yet) birthday gifts, etc.  I just ran out to find packing tape to ship a box and got sidetracked organizing our junk.  So, here are a few things I like to do to make life easier for you (and me) around the house.
NO MATTER WHAT THE SIZE, YOU CAN ORGANIZE!
1.) The big tools are never hard to find, are they, it's the little things that you can't ever seem to get your hands on when you need the most.  To make life around our house a little more peaceful, I took the time to have three separate tool boxes: one for the house with tools I know we only use inside (screwdrivers, hammer, wrench, etc.), one for the cars and one in the garage that has just about everything in it.
2.) Each guest bedroom in our house has a separate zipper bag filled with clean sheets, winter sheets, extra throws, etc.  No more guessing which sheets fit what bed because each room, each bed has their very own set within arms length.
3.) Instead of packing the area under your kitchen sink with cleaning supplies then dragging them through the house on cleaning day, I have everything each bathroom needs under each sink..comet, scrub brush, windex, toilet cleaner, shower cleaner, etc.
4.) I love hanging things that should be hung, like pools of string for shipping, tying up fallen tree limbs, etc.  Because we have bamboo growing in part of our property (they'll be a blog about that, too, next week because it's taking over our yard) I love to cut bamboo stems and use them as curtain rods, hanging rods, etc. but I also love the inexpensive expandable curtain rods or shower curtains.  By inserting them in a tight space I can easily hang string and other smaller items that seem to get lost in the mess.

YOU CAN STICK TO THIS!

Sometimes adding a little splish to your backsplash is much easier and far cheaper than you might think!  Don't worry about broken tiles, repairing drywall or an expensive contractor exposing his crack while he fills in yours, this is a true do it yourself project!  Now, if you live in the Taj Mahal or plan on having Martha Stewart for dinner, I probably wouldn't advise stick on tiles...yes, to the lady who just dropped her glass of Orange Juice on the floor in Missouri...I said STICK ON TILES!  I've used these many times in set design, photo shoots and staging projects that called for quick fixes, modern looks and conservative budgets.  No longer do stick on tiles look like hair pieces and fake Lee press-on nails, the designs have come a long way in just a few years and are incredibly reasonable (covering the average back splash area of 12' linear feet will cost you less than $40).  Simply measure, cut with a box cutter, peel off the back and stick away!  Lowes and Ace Hardware carry some interesting designs but many other companies are available online by just doing a quick google search of "stick on tiles."  Go ahead...don't run away from that kitchen update, stick with it with cool, modern sticky tiles!

THE POWER OF SOLAR

Is it really Wednesday already?  Actually, I should be asking, "am I really that old already??"  I've been absent from my duties here for the last week because I've been busy DOING a lot of the things I blog about...painting, wallpapering, morphing old furniture into new pieces, mowing, planting and, well, preparing to add another notch in the headboard of my life.  So, I'm back with a lot to tell you but today's tip is a rather simple one.  While Joe dreams of a huge, lush garden, sadly the universe hasn't quite figured out how to squeeze a few more hours into each day, so for now we need to take it one step at a time, one plant at a time and one pot at a time.  When attacking a move I often suggest focusing on one box at a time, so we are using the same approach with our patio garden, one step at a time.  I love tomatoes, so we will start there.  Because we live in a deeply wooded area in the Hudson Valley, we have many unwelcome visitors throughout the day and night in the form of deer.  While they drop their bits and ticks in our yard, they also eat just about anything in sight, so this garden will be placed on our deck far out of reach (and munching teeth) of the nasty deer!  For less than $5 I popped over to the Home Depot and grabbed potting soil and a few packages of tomato seeds.  Making sure my pots have a drainage hole and plenty of sun, I added potting soil, my seeds and let mother nature and the massive rain do the rest.
SOlar COOL:
If you dream of planting a regular garden in your yard but have no clue where to place it, here is a simple tip that's guaranteed to tell you where the best sunlight is for that perfect garden...head over to the dollar store and pick up a few solar lights.  Place them in various parts of your yard where you plan on having a garden.  Let them sit for a day then walk around after sunset and see where the brightest lights are and that's where you should place your garden! (cheap lights like those from the dollar store are best for this test because they don't have anything fancy built in to make them shine regardless of sun intensity)

WHAT A WEENIE!

If I had a dollar for every time a politician got caught with his pants down I wouldn't be sitting here writing about wieners and Anthony Weiner's wiener!  When we moved to New York five years ago our then senator Anthony Weiner was caught with his pants down (literally with his pants down) and soon thereafter ducked out of politics and the spotlight until now.  Weiner, as the headlines this morning said, has grown a pair and is back "bigger than ever" but instead of diving into the ridiculousness of everything about this man and where his head is (or isn't), I'd rather take a dive into summer.  It is, after all, right around the corner.  One of my favorite things to do during the summer months is to grill out and one of my favorite things to grill, you guessed it, wieners!  Nathans are my favorite, but another favorite is charcoal grilling versus gas grills.  In my opinion, there is no better taste than something..anything..grilled on a charcoal grill.  We grill just about everything, by the way..from our corn on the cob (left in the husks) to pork chops, broccoli to burgers we love it all.  For the occasional summer camping trip I picked up the cute charcoal grill on top from World Market for $24.00.  After testing many charcoals over the last several summers, we love cowboy charcoal ($7 a bag at Home Depot and Lowes).  Summer is here so get your head in the game, zip it up and grill some weenies!!

YOU LIGHT UP MY LIFE

I met an electrician today and wanted to slap him across the face when he gave me a quote to install two lighting fixtures for a client.  After telling him my long-winded story of plug-in chandeliers I use over and over, I clued him in and showed him out!  The two bedrooms above use the same inexpensive, incredibly easy technique for installing a chandelier...a plug-in kit from a hardware store or Ikea for under $15 and the lampshade of your choosing (the black one on top I use all the time from Ikea is only $15).  No potential shock from doing it yourself or stinky electrician to worry about, just a sassy lampshade hanging from your ceiling and a job well done! So, the next time someone gives you a ridiculous quote, quote me and tell them to get lost!

GIVE IT NEW MEANING

I know I'm repeating myself (and no, it's not from the wonderful Indian food Joe made this weekend), but I love to take old pieces, tweak them a bit and give them new purpose.  I visited my friends Don and Jane in New Hampshire recently and was blown away by some of the cool things they've done to make their home unique and extra special.  Don, for example, took an old door and turned it into a cool desk and used reclaimed wood to make incredible frames for artwork.  To add fun shades to drab outdoor string lights, Jane took small plastic dixie cups and covered them in fabric (by cutting a hole in the bottom of the cup just big enough to slip the light through and hanging the cups upside down).  Usually other peoples creativity gets my juices flowing, so I try to use as many as I can in clients homes.  Take the top photo from a few years ago (believe I've shared this one already, but hey, we all repeat sometimes).  A client with zero budget for redesigning their space asked me to reuse several pieces to create an office area, so I found two abandoned bookshelves and an old door in her attic and went to town...literally to town to find paint.  After sanding and painting the shelves and doors in slightly different shades of the same hue, I mounted the door on top of the shelves to create, what I thought, was a one-of-a-kind desk.  I visited the client and she's still using the same desk, so I guess she liked it too!  More recently I found wood that had been removed from an old barn in a clients backyard, so I grabbed several pieces and (with bronze wall brackets purchased at the hardware store) mounted them on either side of a guest bed for an interesting focal point and cool bedside tables.  From Jane and Don's imaginative creations to my cool finds, good design doesn't have to cost a fortune!

WHEN IN DOUBT. EDIT A BIT

Once again I'm rushing through my day and, as luck would have it, my camera is acting up again.  Here's the main point I wanted to get across as I head out the door with two different colored shoes, an ill fitting shirt, pants that are from six seasons ago..sometimes, in life and at home, it's better to edit.  Take this entry way, for example (if you can see the stretched image).  The area is big, open and has gorgeous wood floors but the owners had everything covered up with heavy, thick carpet and furniture fit for a parlor room, not an entry.  So, I did a little editing..which I need to do right now too!

LIFE IN BLACK & WHITE

My brother visited my parents this weekend in Southern California for Mother's Day (and I, the least favorite kid, couldn't make the trip west happen this week).  What better thing to do when visiting home than to flip through old photos and reminisce.  Dwight found this great picture from 1972 of my mother window shopping in Seattle with him in tow.  The photo later appeared in the Seattle Times and my father noticed it because he recognized my mothers legs (I still laugh at this story because he did NOT mention his son..just my mothers legs!).  At any rate, cool pictures like this and the stories behind them remind me how much I still love flipping through albums...real albums, that is, and not those stored on an iphone, ipad, ipod or iMac.  When a client recently asked me what I was going to do with her giant bare walls for "art" I set out on a little project..with her permission, I dug through boxes of old photos and had them all printed in black and white in various sizes from 4x6 to 11x14.  I found fun, wood-washed frames at World Market (www.worldmarket.com) and created a collage on one wall of her family through the years.  Not only do these walls talk, they tell the story of where this colorful family has been and reminds everyone who walks into the room to slow down, take it all in and enjoy the moment.

STARS AND STRIPES

The other day I heard a rather snooty Manhattan designer say (at the top of her lungs, of course) "I'm having a brown moment and need to feed it!" Humm.  While I could've said many things , I just smiled and moved along.  Had she asked, however, I too was having my very own brown moment that day as I brain stormed for a client who's version of a color wheel is very, very small compared to the rest of us.  Actually, her wheel has only one color..brown.  Don't get me wrong, I love brown and think it's often magical because, unlike some snooty designers, it always plays well with others.  Paint a room the right shade of brown and just about anything will work with it to bring a dramatic pop..blues, yellows, reds, whites...My lovely Mrs. Brown, however, was a tough cookie when it came to convincing her to paint stripes on her wall.  So, I did what I do with anyone questioning my vision..I left in a snit.  Actually, that isn't true...I did leave, but headed to the Home Depot where I bought two samples of browns (for under $10) and a piece of plywood, painted a few stripes and let he sit with the sample for a few days.  When I heard back from her she said she wanted not one room, but three painted with stripes.  She had a very brown moment!
STAYING IN THE LINES:
I'm one of those strange people that absolutely hate using blue painters tape.  In my opinion, it never works.  No matter how hard you push it down it still brings bits of paint up when you remove it.  So, here's what I do.  I measure my stripes, how wide I want them, etc. then I use a pencil and trace the lines on the wall.  I take lessons learned as a little kid coloring in a coloring book and apply them here...I slowly paint inside the lines.

CRAWLING UP THE WALLS

I'm going to need you to hold your breath, reserve judgement and just go with me on this one for a second.  I, too, was skeptical once upon a time when my very hip Aunt Rita (we call her Alex because we think it sounds "hipper") suggested wallpapering the walls and ceiling in the same toile paper in the master bedroom of her beautiful Carmel, California home.  My first problem; toile paper.  It isn't for everyone and it certainly isn't for every home, but true to Aunt Rita/Alex's form, she knew exactly what she was doing (I went to boarding school not far from her and spent weekends helping gussy up her already sassy place...one weekend we white-washed the beams in her master bedroom.  Again, I thought it was kinda nuts, but the final product was stunning).  When the wallpaper hit the walls and crawled up onto the ceilings of my hip Aunts bedroom, it left an incredibly stunning result and everyone asking, "why didn't I think of that?"  Today when I suggest the same dramatic spin on wallpaper design, I get similar looks I gave her..bewilderment, awkward silence followed by a look that could only say, "is this guy insane?"  But, believe it or not, adding something as simple as wallpaper to your ceiling (not the walls) is incredible.  And, if I have to say this one more time and scream it from the top of a mountain, IT WILL NOT MAKE YOUR SPACE FEEL SMALLER. unless, that is, you live in a tiny, black box.  Go ahead, be brave.

SIMPLE WAYS TO A MORE INTERESTING LIFE

I don't like boring people and I certainly don't enjoy boring rooms.  The past few weeks have been packed with clients desperately seeking advice on sprucing up less than thrilling rooms, namely, bathrooms.  Everyone jumps to the same (somewhat irrational) conclusion when I mention sprucing up a bathroom...after screeching at pitches high enough to make coyotes roar in neighboring states, they yelp about budget, expensive renovations, etc. etc.  I always end up explaining that simple tweaks can make drastic differences.  Here are three ways to go from boring to fabulous.
1.) I love to make a half bath as dramatic as possible.  While many think adding dark colors or bold wallpaper in a small space will "close it in" as one lovely client mentioned Friday, that just isn't true.  And, besides, you're in a windowless half bath..that's already pretty closed in!  So, I choose wallpaper with bold, vibrant colors or something unexpected like a chandelier.  A great store in New Jersey called Capital Lighting sells fabulous chandeliers for as little as $100!
2.) Depending on the style of the home and taste level of the homeowner, adding breadboard and a chair rail and painting them both can make an inexpensive, dramatic pop.  If you don't own a saw at home, rent one at Home Depot or Lowes or, better yet, be nice to the guy, give him your measurements and nine times out of ten he'll cut it for you while you wait.
3.) Just about every house I've been in has the large standard mirror above the vanity.  At the very least I like to add molding around the mirror to make it look like a unique, store-bought piece (you can attach molding directly to mirror with liquid nails..comes in a tube for about $5).  In a larger master bath, I remove the mirror entirely and add two smaller mirrors over the sinks.  This gives a far more unique, custom feel and costs next to nothing.

AQUA WITH ENVY

I would never post a shameless promotion for my book about vintage travel trailers, known for their classic aqua and white dressed walls, here..sure to be a pop culture HiT (Serro Scotty Travel Trailers by Paul Hecht on Amazon NOW), but while we are talking about falling in love with color...a client I met last year said she had fallen head over heals for, you guessed it, AQUA everything.  I warned her about going too gaga for aqua...I suggested maybe adding the color in a pillow here or one wall there, few lamps in the bedroom and maybe a throw on the fainting sofa in the living room..but committing to one color in your home, I explained to this diva, is like committing to one hair color for the rest of your life. GASP! This strong-headed (and multi-hair colored) lady wasn't having it, though.  She had to have EVERYTHING Aqua, so I granted her wishes and ten months into renovating her 5,500 square foot home head to toe-kick, she walked up to me today and said, "I think I'm hating the aqua now..totally over it, in fact.  I'm now in love with mauve."  After digging her hair out from under my fingernails a few hours ago, I called her and guided the lovely empress to an email I sent one year ago today.  It reads...
DO WE ENVY AQUA OR IS AQUA FULL OF ENVY?
Because I know you, I know I can be honest..one color for you, my love, is like one husband for the rest of your life.  Or one martini...just aint enough!  Committing to one color, in my opinion, means in one year you will want to break up with it, toss it in the Hudson River, forget its name forever and hate me for letting you do it.  Where you want to wallpaper your entire bedroom with aqua wallpaper, may I suggest only one wall? Where you want to paint your floors aqua in the dining room and add an aqua chandelier, may I suggest one or two accent chairs in aqua and everything pale grey or white?  When you said, "bitch I want everything in my bathroom AQUA" first, don't call me "bitch" and second, neutral tile colors and walls painted in aqua? Those things we can easily change in a year...and entire house..like a marriage..is far more complicated to dissolve.
forever yours in aqua hell....

TALK TO THE HAND

Ever feel like a total friggin idiot? Welcome to my every day!  So, last week I was on the road A LOT and had my trusty ipad at my side the entire time.  As I patiently waited for my impatient clients while they screamed at tile salespeople for not producing fresco's by Michelangelo at Ikea prices, I typed away on my blog.  As I bounced and bumped home on the train from Manhattan with a bad-breathed wall Streeter asleep on my shoulder, I blogged on my iPad.  While waiting at one of the tackiest furniture stores I've ever seen (complete with free popcorn and candy while you shopped for recliners with coolers attached) I blogged.  Then, this weekend, while browsing fabulous sites for cool things, I noticed NONE of my blogs had posted from last week from my iPad.  Then, in a weak moment, I tossed my iPad over our hill and into the Hudson River.  After all, it's the ipads fault, NOT MINE.  So, today, I need a hand, not a "pad" on the back.
GIVE ME A HAND, PLEASE!
I blogged about this last year and, yeah, I'm blogging about it again because it makes a great gift for Mom, Dad or your house for summer parties.  Several companies are now making cheese cutting boards in the shape of whatever state you want.  Some charge as high as $48 while some (on Amazon) are as low as $19.99.  Don't be cheesy, be happy!!!

SLOW BOAT TO A GREAT MEAL

Matt Lauer isn't what's wrong with morning talk shows, it's the cooking segments that make me absolutely insane.  Here's the problem.  They book someone mildly interesting (and I don't mean Martha Stewart with her odd collection of birds, thatched pots and impossible tasks and treats), but someone like Giada, Ina Garten, Bobby Flay or my favorite, Christopher Kimball from Americas Test Kitchen on PBS (and author of the Cooks Illustrated series of books and magazines).  The morning shows are so packed with crap they rush the cooks through the most ridiculous bit of nonsense in as little time as possible..HERE, YOU HAVE THIRTY SECONDS TO SHOW US HOW TO MAKE BOTH THANKSGIVING AND CHRISTMAS DINNER WHILE I, THE IDIOT HOST, TRY TO PRETEND LIKE I DON'T KNOW HOW TO WORK A BLENDER OR HOLD A SPOON!!!  I. Just. Can't. Stand. IT!  But, one morning while I was sipping coffee and cursing at the foolish hosts for being idiots, Chris Kimball was on promoting his slow cooker cookbook, the Slow Cooker Revolution(amazon for $14).  Here's one more reason why I love Chris (if you haven't seen his show, wait for a rainy Saturday and catch it on PBS or pick up any of his fantastic cookbooks...not only does he come up with incredible recipes, he tests everything from soups to pots and pans (hence...TEST KITCHEN).  Anyway, Chris just doesn't seem to care about anything but cooking.  Host rushing him along? Who cares?  He just stands there with his bow tie chatting away.  I bought Joe a slow cooker (crock pot) a few years ago as a joke and it's turned into one of our favorite kitchen tools.  Last weekend he made slow cooked short ribs (took about ten hours) and BOY were they delicious and did our house ever smell like heaven! Tonight I'm making macaroni and cheese.  The beauty in preparing a meal in a slow cooker is you can prep in the morning and most meals take 10-12 hours to slow cook while you're at work.  You walk in the door after an exhausting day with your co-hosts to a home smelling like heaven.
THE MAC DADDY OF MAC AND CHEESE:
Now Joe makes a homemade mac and cheese that will make you wanna slap yo mamma and move to Canada, so I can't say this one is better but it's pretty darn good! We have a Hamilton Beach cooker I bought at Target for $50ish.  I line it with foil and spray with vegetable oil so the macaroni doesn't burn (because slow cookers tend to have really hot sides that can burn).  So, here's what you do.  After prepping your slow cooker like I've mentioned above (fold foil and wrap around sides like a collar, not the bottom), simmer these items:
2/ 12 oz cans of evaporated milk
2/ 11 oz cans of condensed cheddar cheese soup (I used Campbell's)
2.5 cups water
1 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon dry mustard
1/8 teaspoon cayenne pepper
Again, bring all items above to a simmer in a SEPARATE POT on your stove.  Then add...
2 cups shredded sharp cheddar
2 cups shredded monterey jack cheese
LET THE CHEESE COMPLETELY MELT THEN add 1 pound elbow macaroni and stir.
Transfer this mixture carefully to your prepared slow cooker (might want to put a kitchen towel over one side because it splashes and is very, very hot)
COOK HIGH FOR TWO HOURS UNTIL MACARONI IS TENDER
REMOVE FOIL "COLLAR" AND GENTLY STIR PASTA, ADDING HOT WATER AS NEEDED TO LOOSEN SAUCE CONSISTENCY. SEASON WITH SALT AND PEPPER TO TASTE. IF YOU LIKE AND HAVE ENOUGH TIME BEFORE THE HOSTS CUT YOU OFF, SPRINKLE WITH TOASTED BREAD CRUMB TOPPING.

AND JUST LIKE THAT, IT'S MONDAY AGAIN!

What a week it was last week, huh?  But just like everything in life, we chug right along to the next thing.  If you're like me, you were glued to your TV and radio following the dramas in our nation as they unfolded in Boston and West, Texas.  Quite honestly, I just didn't feel like blogging about design tips and culinary bits while I thought about the people's lives that were changed last week.  But, again, it's time to roll on ahead, so with a new week comes new challenges.  Spring is here, folks!  As the flowers bloom and trees return to their glorious shades of green (and I sneeze and cackle away), spring cleaning is on the brain of many.  If you live in cold climates where winter was long, dark and snowy it's almost time to throw open your windows and let your house breath some fresh air.  It's still a chilly 45 degrees in my hood today, so that might be put off for a few more days.  Standing at the sink brushing my teeth this morning I did notice nasty build up on our bathroom tile floors and walls.  I get this question a lot, so today I'm going to share a little secret.
DON'T POUT...CLEAN YOUR GROUT!
Sometimes when I've walked into filthy homes I've been tempted to re-grout dirty bathrooms to make them shine, but you don't have to go to all that hassle.  I use Baking soda.  Because it cleans without scratching tile, Baking soda is the perfect solution for dirt and grime.  Here's the trick; it loses its abrasive properties quickly when mixed with water, so I wet the surface I'm cleaning (in this case the filthy grout on our bathroom tile) then apply the powder in small areas and brush into a lather.  In no time at all the shine is back and so is the spring in my step, because I love being clean!!

TIPSY TUESDAY

Yeah, I know, I've been repeating a lot lately, but this isn't exactly a repeat Tuesday.  I've found myself this lovely, cold spring diving into hot messes of kitchens across our area.  Maybe people are spending their tax returns or they're just sick and tired of the same old kitchen, but whatever the reason, I've been in more kitchen and bath stores lately than I've been in my own kitchen and baths!  With three very different clients with three dramatically varied kitchens (and budgets) I've had even more fun trying to wiggle as much  design room into their rooms.  My fallback favorite for stainless steel sinks is the Elkay brand, where prices range from $400+, but when pinching pennies I head to Sweden..or at least Paramus, New Jersey's version at Ikea.  The two examples above are as different as my clients this month...one is $799 and the other is $135.  Can you tell which one is which?  The top sink is the winner in the tight budget category for $135 from Ikea, this stainless steel sink is the same size and looks identical to the Elkay product line below.  So why ever go higher?  Some people just love a brand name, that's why!  With the savings I got from purchasing the less expensive sink I was able to upgrade the faucet (always a must in my opinion) and add a backsplash.  I know I sound like a commercial for Burlington Coat Factory, but it's true.  Spend where you can and, more importantly, save when you can!

DRY MONDAY

After a wild and crazy weekend, couldn't you use a dry Monday?  Now, I've mentioned this tip before, but I'm getting a bit older so you'll have to excuse me when I start repeating (hopefully stories will be the only thing I'll be repeating for now..).  This works, though, so if you haven't read my previous tip, give this one a try and your wet bottles will be dry, dry, dry!
HOW MANY BOTTLES OF BEER ON THE WALL?
I love collecting cool bottles of different shapes to reuse as vases, serving pieces for water at dinner parties, holding homemade salad dressing, etc. After using them, though, cleaning them is the easy part..drying them out can take days and leave nasty streaks, unless you use my simple tip.  Insert a rolled up paper towel and insert most of the way in.  Let sit for a day (or most of it) and the water drops will vanish completely (the towel soaks them up!)

THE RUG DOCTOR

If I had a dollar for every time I sent a text or email with misspelled words (totally unintended, of course) I'd probably own half of Apple!  Yesterday a lovely woman emailed me with a brief statement: "I need help with my urine."  After suggesting she consult a Physician and not a designer, she sent a quick reply, "no, no, my dogs urine!"  Still a tad confused, I assumed she was referring to what many animal lovers deal with on a daily basis..pet urine, the stench and the often difficult task of getting rid of it!  Because our home is not actually ours, rather our lovely dog Canyon's, we deal with removing pet odors all the time.  Ever notice, by the way, if you bring something new home your pet usually finds an instant attraction to it? Before our sweet love Bones died a few years ago, he was literally on everything in our house.  I bought expensive throw pillows to hide stains he (or his sister) left behind on our sofa, only to find him drooling all over it one afternoon.  It still makes me smile, though, knowing how comfortable he was in our home...and his sister has taken up right where he left off!  One thing I've suggested before and will mention again as we roll into spring and summer, is the great selection of indoor/outdoor rugs, pillows and other furniture pieces that can seamlessly transition from outdoor decor to indoors.  After I discovered Bones love of throw pillows, I ran to Pottery Barn and picked up dozens of outdoor pillows during a fall sale.  The patterns were so simple they easily translated to our interior decor (no frilly butterfly patterns or other outdoorsy themes).  When Bones or Canyon dribbled and drooled (or an over-served guest dribbled or drooled), I could easily wipe up the mess spilled on the outdoor fabric.  Designs in outdoor rugs are becoming more modern and hip, too, with stores like Walmart and Target creating incredible designs for your outdoor spaces.  So beautiful, in fact, I suggest using them inside if you have pets, children or are prone to losing control of your bodily functions.  They're beautiful, inexpensive and incredibly easy to clean!

MUNDANE MONDAY

I'm sure I'm going to bore the bejusus out of you with this blog because, yep, I'm plugging one of my favorite design ideas yet again...WaLLPaPer!  YES, I have been talking about it a lot because, well, I've been using it to spruce up room after boring room in the last few months.  This simple project was no different.  The homeowner said she was stumped by what to do in her plain, white, drab bedroom, so I put on my technicolored thinking cap and got to work.  The one caveat...she hates color...in fact, even the slightest suggestion of color.  So, rather than dive into the world of the mundane by splashing various shades of white (yes, believe it or not, there are various shades of white ), I decided to smack her in the face with a few deeper hues for contrast. What better way to make a white room pop than to introduce greys and blacks?  Stop twitching, it isn't that scary people!  By adding a beautiful print with black and grey twigs on one wall I was able to bring her floating white bed into a grounded position with an interesting focal point, create depth and interest and, hell, warm the space up a bit!  I swapped out a few white sheets for shades of grey I found online on sale and traded a boring overhead light for a shocking, black pendant lamp.  Even this hard-edged New Yorker cracked a smile when she walked into her new space (unless she was preparing to spit on me).
CREATE A FUN PAD WITH YOUR IPAD:
I mentioned this great design app last week that I downloaded for $9.99.  While it's fairly simple to use, instructional videos are limited to two and I have yet to hear back after I emailed a question on Friday.  But a little time of playing around with it proved invaluable.  You can actually upload real photos saved on your iPad.  So, for example, this client couldn't picture what the wallpaper was going to look like in her room, so I was able to upload this print to her design.  While the app comes with several versions of wallpaper, most are too general and vague, but this little feature made it much easier for my client to envision her future.

DON'T OVERSPEND, JUST OVERSTOCK!

It's Friday and I'm in the mood to save some money!  One of the only things I've found that I don't like about www.overstock.com are the tiny downloadable images from their site, but other than that I'm SOLD!  I'm working with a client this week who has just landed a fabulous Manhattan apartment and wants to stock it up with over the top modern design elements.  While I love spending other peoples money, I don't like overspending it!  Meet the Saarinen Dining Table, a favorite in mid-century design and the image you can actually see (on the bottom) is from Design Within reach where a 48" version of this table retails for $4,600.  If you squint, grab a magnifying glass or just visit overstock.com you will see the Saarinen's much cheaper sister (she might be cheap, but she aint slutty!) called the Eero Sarrinen Style table which sells for just $544.72!  I love to mix and match styles, textiles and colors as much as I love to play with price points.  I often use an antique with more modern pieces, blend old fabrics with new (place vintage pillows on a new sofa, for example), so in this case will save on the table and splurge on the chairs.  Sometimes just because you can, doesn't always mean you should! While my client was willing to spend, I convinced her to save!

SPOONFED DESIGNS

Have you heard the news, wallpaper is back IN style?  Actually it never went anywhere, but many of us were too busy removing the nasty, old paper in our homes to pay attention to the spike in the trend.  Yes indeed it is a royal pain in the hind quarters to remove the stuff if you don't like it, but not only are more companies creating temporary designs (easily removed without harming walls underneath) but now you can turn just about anything into wallpaper. www.spoonflower.com is a website I fell in love with last month while designing the bedroom of a young doctor in upstate New York.  She carried with her through college and medical school, precious photos of her grandparents and parents, vintage fabrics from a great aunt and other memorabilia she just couldn't part with.  Spoon Flower allows you to turn any of these into fabric or wallpaper by scanning them and uploading them to their site.  A classic gingham pocket square of her great-grandfathers dating back to the late 1800's, for example, translates to a gorgeous wall covering in her entryway (a 24"x12' roll runs $60).  Don't know what to do with granny's wedding dress? Turn it into throw pillows for a guest room!  Love that shirt you wore as a teenager but don't dare walk out of the house with it? Make it into framed art!  I hate to see nostalgic pieces rot away in basements and attics, so before they fade away keep those memorable moments alive by giving them a new, modern life.
NOT TO TOOT MY ALREADY LOUD HORN, BUT SPOONFLOWER WAS FEATURED ON THE TODAY SHOW THIS MORNING...SOME MIGHT SAY I'M AHEAD OF THE TREND...

DESIGNING THE PERFECT TUESDAY

Don't you love daily reminders that whisper (or in my case, scream) in your ear, "hey, jerk, you're getting older by the minute!"  I can't believe that just a few short years ago when I was in college (short to the third power, that is) courses were offered for design students focusing on 3D drawings. I took four of these classes over a two year period (probably costing in the area of $5,000 when you break down tuition costs per class).  Today I can barely create legible drawings when playing "Scattegories" (the same can be said for my command of the Spanish language after four years of espanol, but we won't go there).  My first internships at two shows ("Days of Our Lives" and "Frasier") hired highly skilled individuals and paid hefty salaries for them to draw renderings of sets for each episode.  The art directors would spend hours upon hours creating intricate drawings for the production crew.  And today, with the tap of an app at the bargain basement cost of $9.99, you can swipe and click away to the perfect interior design of your choice.  I've talked about Home Design 3D (an app I purchased a few years ago for my iPad) but Interior Design for ipad brings even more options, easier functionality and simple ways of sharing your designs with anyone, anywhere.  Like any tech application I suggest lighting a candle and pouring a glass of wine before diving into this one.  While fairly easy to navigate, it still takes a bit of getting used to, but in no time your ideas go from simple thoughts to beautiful three dimensional renderings.  Planning a kitchen renovation this summer?  Don't wait for an architect to draw plans and charge you thousands, download this app and show him what you want! Dying to freshen up your master bedroom but can't picture what anything will look like? This app comes with hundreds of furniture pieces, textiles, accessories, wall colors and wallpaper.  If it doesn't have something you like, you can download an image from the internet.  While advances in technology continue to blow me away, I get great pleasure in impressing clients with colorful, beautiful renderings in far less time, for far less money than ever before.  So, tap into your inner designer by tapping this app today!

TODAY I MET AN APRIL FOOL

Sometimes my job feels more like a therapist than designer, exercising extreme patience rather than choosing fabrics and paint colors.  But, that goes with the territory and most days I take it in stride.  Today, as I shopped for antique vases for a client I threw patience out the window when faced with a nasty store owner in dire need of therapy.  While Rush Limbaugh yakked in the background on her hand radio, she kept correcting my pronouncing of the word "vase." This upstate New Yawker (who had just referred to two individuals as "yous") insisted it was pronounced "vahz." Rather than explain to her that we were in the Hudson Valley of New York and not in the english countryside, ruled by a monarchy, I let it go, but had to giggle because I've heard this word thrown around our area like beads at Mardi Gras.  For whatever reason some people just feel better mispronouncing words, I guess!  So, to the nasty store owner who said, as I walked out the door, "thanks Pwwall, hope yous enjoy that vahz." FOOOK YOU!
YOU SAY VAHZ, I DON'T:
As I collected various antique vases to use in a master bathroom to organize makeup brushes and other grooming accessories, I also picked up a few oversized new vases at Home Goods (for $9.99) to group on an entry table.  So I didn't have to bust my budget on flowers filling the huge vases I used this simple little tip to make the vase overflow with beauty...simply inserted a much smaller vase inside the larger one and filled it to the top with colors that pop!

NOW YOU SEE IT, NOW YOU DON'T

I've seen more houses lately than Lindsey Lohan's seen judges, and frankly, I've judged some of them! One of my biggest obstacles when staging a home is not how to make it shine, but how to dial down the homeowners.  Mind you, while I have a discerning eye for design, I never openly judge anyones choices (at least not in front of them..that's what blogs are for).  Trying to convince a seller to step away from emotion is often a bigger job than staging or selling the home.  Take, if you will,  a lovely woman I met last year who owned a fantastic estate, high atop a hill in the Hudson Valley with million dollar views.  The multi-million dollar asking price meant the house had to look pristine.  Realtors had commented on the dated feel, so I merely suggested we start with a clean slate and paint over bright walls with a monochromatic color.  Well, this sweet lady turned a bit sour when I suggested erasing her favorite shade of pink with something a tad more subtle.  I had to remind her that we weren't selling the house to her and we needed to feed a bigger, broader audience.  Eventually she gave in and so did the buyers a few months later.  In another home of a different style in a city far, far away (or at least in the owners mind) I found a homeowner equally as desperate to sell as he was to hold on to the Mediterranean design he'd introduced to this east coast home.  Every niche and alcove was painted with a Tuscan flare, and as our eastern sun shined on these pieces, my suggestion of painting over them nearly made him pass out.  I suggested next time he do what another client did in her Mediterranean home...she had an artist paint canvases the size of her niches, placed velcro on the back and when she moved (as she often did) she just peeled away her beautiful scene and carried it onto the next place!